Believe me when I tell you, I know how it feels. It is vicious. It really can get out of hand. But we have to go through it and what makes it bad is that it recurs, hence the illusion that it will never stop. It will. Eventually, it will stop. It will stop for a while, as if you have overcome it. Then, it will come back, like an unwanted guest paying a visit when you least expect it.
But then, everything in life is like that, is it not? Joy leaves and appears at your doorstep. Success is often very difficult to chase but, in due course, you will catch her. Love is as fleeting, as damaging, as unpredictable, as overwhelming and underwhelming as you can imagine. But we don’t stop falling in love, we don’t choose to do something about it. We just go through breakups and dating over and over again.
This is not me saying you should just let your sadness be. This is just me attempting to tell you, you are stronger than what you want to believe. You have great skills that you must recognize and that you have so much more to give than to give up.